Folks, I'm officially the world's worst cook. I just burned rice in the microwave. How horrible is that? In the microwave! Rice! And in case you were wondering, no, you cannot put American cheese in the broiler and expect it to melt! No, instead it crackles pops and snaps and then promptly burns.

This is what I was trying to make (and I have, btw, made this successfully many times in the past - it's a great way to get rid of leftovers). At any rate, the result is a passable omlet and it smells good, though it will take weeks to air my apartment out from the multiple burnings.

Lori, I'm coming over there for dinner.