Big Yellow Taxi

I went on my first taxi ride in just about forever yesterday, and I should apologize since my headline is misleading: the taxi was actually green. I was supposed to take a cab from the airport over to my final destination, ie the office. I should have figured out something was up when I told the cabby the address. He kind of gave me a blank look and repeated the street name over and over again.

Luckily, I had written down directions from the airport to the office before leaving in the morning so I directed the cabby down the street and asked him to get on the highway heading west. For reasons still unknown to be, he decided to get on going EAST. And when I pointed this out to him, he agreed to turn around, but seemingly was oblivious to the CONSTRUCTION in the city (Big City to the North can certainly give Sweat Sock City a run for the money when it comes to moving major arteries around!). Anyway, cabby gets off the highway as I ask him to, but discovers he cannot go west. Excellent. So we end up going further East ("Look, kids, SKYLINE!") and finally, get off and manage to get on a west-bound ramp. OH THE DRAMA.

Then I tell the cabby expressly, "I want to get off at exit 39 and oh, by the way, that over there is the building I want to go to." There was plenty of pointing to go along with the verbal -- which is an improvement over many situations, as my brother says to me quite often, "Use your WORDS." Anyway, cabby somehow misses exit 39 and we end up on another highway. I say, "TURN AROUND. WE ARE GOING THE WRONG WAY." Does he turn around? NO. Meanwhile, I'm starting to panic. I'm due for a meeting at noon (lunch beforehand), and I had planned my trip with an ample cushion for exactly this kind of situation. But, pray tell me, how does a normal 15-minute car trip suddenly turn into an HOUR?

So while I was watching my cushion of time evaporate, the cabby finally realized we had to turn around. I happened to look at the meter by then, which was dismally climbing up with every wrong turn. And what do you know, once we're back on the right highway, he gets off at the WRONG EXIT. We then proceed to drive around in a shopping center for 10 minutes, all the while my office building is in plain sight, and YET THE CABBY CANNOT TAKE ME THERE. Did I mention it was a $2 charge just to sit in the taxi? That every quarter mile is 40 cents? OH THE BILL.

Finally, he flagged down a fireman who directed us to another road that would take me to my office. The cabby finally deposited me in front of the building, and I honestly felt like stiffing him his tip because all of his errors ended up costing me $10 to $20 in additional cab fare. However, I was just eager to get out of the car and up into the meeting, so I did the nice thing and gave him a nominal tip. I made it into the lunch with about 15 minutes to spare. Oh! I forgot to mention the cabby gave me his card so I could call him when I needed a ride back. Thanks, but no thanks. The rest of my business trip, thankfully, was cab-free.