Thursday, September 30, 2004

Phone confessions

Things you should know:

  • When my phone rings, it sounds like a doorbell. The doorbell sound is my own fault; one afternoon, while taking a nap, the phone rang. Three times. Three times telemarketers. Not even people I like, but telemarketers rousing me from my Saturday nap. Fie! Fie on you telemarketers! I tried to turn the ringer off but you see, my dad got me a New High Tech Shiny Phone that requires an engineering degree to master; as we all know, I do not have an engineering degree -- I am a business major, for goodness sakes. So I thought I turned off the handset, but instead transferring the phone ring to the base and I can't figure out how to turn off the base.

  • The doorbell sound causes some problems because I can't figure out if it's a fundraising teen at my door or a telemarketer. The end result: I screen phone calls! Forgive me! If you call between 6 and 9 pm on my landline, I'm automatically going to assume you want to sell me health insurance at a fraction of the cost. Mea culpa in advance!

  • I hate call waiting with a passion. There's nothing you can say to me that will convince me otherwise. I always feel second-best when I talk to people with call waiting. "Hey," they say, "can you hold on? I'm getting another call." And then a few seconds later they say, "Oh I really need to talk to this other person, bye!" Humph. So, if both my cell phone and landline are busy, I'm talking to someone who needs my full attention or I'm busy and can't come to the phone; so leave a message. I promise, when I'm done with whoever I'm talking to or whatever I'm doing, I will call you back and give you my full attention.*

  • I find it hard to sit still while talking on the phone. Which is why most of my housecleaning happens while on the phone. I don't vaccuum, obviously, but dishes are fair game, as is mopping/sweeping the floors, and changing out linens and doing laundry.

  • And I'm ashamed to admit I don't answer the phone during some of my favorite shows. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I should be a better person and not let the boob tube rule my life, but it goes back to giving the person I'm talking to my whole attention. I mean, would you really want to compete with The Donald's Boardroom? Or Tribal Council? Or the Cool Navy Show With Fighter Planes and Pretty People? I didn't think so.

Linkage: File under 'Hello, pot!' Bush's Top Ten Flip-Flops. Thanks to Lori for the link!

*Or you can do like Florida Girl, when she really needs my attention, which is to call my cell phone every five minutes. Dilligence like that, I'm bound to notice.

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