Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Living through you

When people are successful, you can take heart and encouragement from what they've accomplished. I think it's easy to look at someone you identify with and say, "Hey, the did it, so can I!" In theory, that's how it works. But here's the tricky part -- we've all accomplished something other people want to accomplish. We all have something someone else wants. The key is how to motivate without slipping into condescension and it's hard to get that tone -- not to mention, the timing of the message -- exactly right. What moves one person into action may not necessarily work on another person at all, and heck, may insult another person all together.

I appreciate the unsolicited pep talks as much as the next person, but there are also times when I just want to say, "Hey, that's what worked for you and it's not necessarily what will work for me. We're different that way. Please acknowledge that." While vicarious living is one to follow an example, it's important to remember we don't all work the same way and no one has the surefire consistent formula that will equal the success you want; the key is to do what makes you happy and satisfied.

One of these days, when I'm my own girl and I've figured all this out, I'll let you know my secret.

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