Sunday, June 20, 2010


When I'm President of the World -- president, because it sounds more benevolent than "dictator" and I do intend to be benevolent -- I plan to enact legislation that will:

* Make it mandatory to return your shopping cart to the little shopping cart stalls in the middle of the parking lot. No more of this leaving the cart anywhere for the vissicitudes of wind to take it away and crash into someone else's car. No more leaving the cart in the middle of a perfectly good spot that makes it unable for anyone else to use. No more blocking someone else in "just because".

* The yield sign will be used correctly, that is, one will stop when one is merging into traffic. A yield sign is essentially a stop sign when moving into traffic, yet it's an oft-ignored sign. It's almost like yield means "go fast, dang it, and heck with anyone who is coming up behind me." Yield. It's the right thing to do.

* Blinkers will be used so everyone around the car in question will know where it's going. And while I'm ranting about blinkers, outlawing left turns from the right lane will be a step in the right direction (I know this last one sounds intuitive, but you'd be amazed at how many times drivers in Sweat Sock City suddenly realize they need to make this left turn while they're in the right lane and they make it, never mind that they nearly get t-boned by the people in the left lane who never saw the turn coming).

* You'll be able to select which channels you want in a cable package so you don't have to buy the whole package, just the ones you want to watch.

I'm sure I'll have other legislation to implement but this is a nice start.

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